Friday, June 16, 2006

Fathers and Leaders

Leadership Journal’s website featured an article titled “Like Father, Like Leader” that revealed some great thought that are worth sharing. The entire article can be read at The Christianity Today website is good to have in your list of favorite sites anyway. Check it out.

Gordon Dalbey suggests three things to remember in your role as a dad and as a leader in general:

Watch for what God is doing in people and bless it.President Kennedy once recalled, "If I walked out on stage and fell flat on my face, Father would say I fell better than anyone else." Good fathers look for opportunities to encourage their children, not with false praise, but with honest appraisal.

Our tendency is to be quick with criticism and slow with praise. We forget that even our kids need to hear words that build up instead of tear down. Is your attention to what your kids do right at least as keen as your attention to what they do wrong. By the way, you may want to ask them instead of asking yourself. Remember that even if you don’t agree with their assessment, it is still their perspective and “perspective is reality.”

Don't coerce behavior, no matter how righteous, but lead into deeper relationship with Jesus.Trying to force "proper behavior" without a loving hand of grace stirs rebellion because it violates the child's heart, which God has already oriented, if not to do the right thing, certainly to do what Dad does. "Be imitators of God, therefore, as dearly loved children" (Eph. 5:1).

Surely the command to avoid embittering your children in Ephesians 6 should cause us to reconsider manipulation and browbeating to coerce good behavior. Go out of your way to model integrity, compassion, generosity, and honesty to your children. God’s primary way of changing you is not via threat of punishment, but calling you to imitate Christ.

Recognize your faults, but don't pass them on.

All of us are going to make mistakes in front of our kids and our children will likely imitate us in it at some point. When you mess up, admit to you children, apologize and vow to do better. Why should your kids respect their mother when you speak disrespectfully to her in front of them and never apologize? Why should your sons respect females when they see you gawking at the Victoria Secret ad? Apologize today. Don’t pass on your faults!

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